here’s to my sweet Santa

The worst aspect of our society’s observance of Christmas is the way adults deceive children into believing there’s a magical bearded man who will grant their wishes if they’re good. But enough about Jesus. Santa Claus, on the other hand, is a truly heroic figure, running, as he does, a pagan mole operation inside the […]

Götzen-Dämmerung, oder, wie man mit dem Hammer philosophiert

Remember how I said that the gods would return to show their might? As always, my predictions were accurate (and I don’t even have a völva), as Thor is alive and well and dishing out divine justice in Ohio: Also gathered along Union Road were Franklin twins and storm chasers Levi and Seth Walsh, who […]

the year we make contact

So Poetariat has been silent for a while, but I guess Smokehouse is probably working, and I’ve been putting some effort into my own personal projects. When finished, said projects may or may not be the subject of a future post. I also have a variety of subjects I’ve been meaning to write about, but […]

after the gold rush

My friend Jason received another feline communiqué from the extraterrestrials: Joey spoke to me again; this time it made no sense at all: “Self-awareness is self-delusion. The man in black sees all. Humanity has reached its end; the cetaceans demand it. The star vibrates. Feel the lion purr as it inherits the earth. The seeds […]

all cats have Asperger syndrome, cont’d

I got some more e-mails from my friend Jason: It happened again. Just as I had finished putting my laundry away, I felt that mysterious buzz inside my head and suddenly found myself in pure white surroundings, with only Joey’s face before me. I had no body of my own; it was like I was […]

all cats have Asperger syndrome

My friend Jason sent me the following e-mail: Space Kat Today Joey revealed to me his space ship which he used to get to this planet. He also telepathically hacked my computer with his mind and made the attached images appear on my Desktop. He then communicated to me that these images are of him […]