Archive for February, 2010

go fuck yourself, Google

Friday, February 12th, 2010

OK, so it’s bad enough that Google knows all my private conversations and preferences in pornography (have I told you about my Lutheran deaconess fetish?*).

And then there’s this creepy NSA collaboration business. Since when is a surveillance agency in the business of cybersecurity anyway? (Although it’s not really a huge surprise.) And how about Youtube’s censorship of questions to President Obama about marijuana legalization?

But now Google had to drop a big steaming turd on my e-mail account. I’m getting tired of your waterhead fuckarounds, Google. All I wanted was e-mail. If I wanted a goddamn social networking site, I would already be on Twatbook or Facefuck or whatever the kids are using these days. And I certainly wouldn’t be on a social network that automatically lists me as “following” my proctologist.

Salient quote:

When I enabled Google Buzz, it was using a photo on my personal Buzz page (not my profile or anything) that I’d taken on my Droid but hadn’t ever uploaded. Why? And why that photo? And–what? That’s just creepy as hell.

And a quote from a Google statement:

We thought very carefully about how to create a great experience in Google Buzz with as minimal setup as possible. We designed our auto-following system to enable users to immediately see content from the people they email and chat with most, so when they start using Buzz, it “just works.” If users are automatically followed to anyone they’d rather not follow, it’s easy to remove these individuals during the auto-following step by clicking on the “edit” link and then clicking “unfollow” next to their names.

(more…)

God’s third mistake

Monday, February 1st, 2010

From page 28 of The Poodle: An Owner’s Guide to a Happy, Healthy Pet by Virginia Parker Guidry, here is the most Zappaesque story ever:

Duc proved himself a clown one evening at a “pompous” dinner party. He had been left upstairs, in case some of the guests did not like dogs; one senses that he may have been somewhat provoked by this slight. Meanwhile, at dinner, the subject of the famous white Poodle was raised; just as his owner was about to expound on his greatness, in walked Duc, all dignity and elegance — with an enema bag in his mouth! As if in the show ring, he marched around the table and out of the room, tail wagging.

edit: Speaking of Zappa, here’s an ironic news story about his hometown (or rather, one of his several hometowns).