after the gold rush

My friend Jason received another feline communiqué from the extraterrestrials: Joey spoke to me again; this time it made no sense at all: “Self-awareness is self-delusion. The man in black sees all. Humanity has reached its end; the cetaceans demand it. The star vibrates. Feel the lion purr as it inherits the earth. The seeds …

suing someone for a blog post is totally not psychotic

So you may have heard about this awful court ruling. Basically an anonymous blogger referred to a model as a “psychotic, lying, whoring, still going to clubs at her age, skank.” Keep in mind that this blog had “only five posts on it, all written on a single day.” So naturally said model, who is …

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

So I just went on omegle.com [I was waiting for a computer to render some stuff, bitches], and in addition to telling a Frenchman that Napoleon Dynamite was “American cinema at its finest,” I had this delightful exchange: Stranger: I’m guessing you’re against black metal? (: You: No, my church has a special black metal …

watch out for your overcoat

Hi! I’ve been absent from the Blog-O-Sphere lately due to my Protestant work ethic. I was going to say it was due to my Viking work ethic, but generally the Viking work ethic involves getting some slaves to do it while you sit around, drink mead, and vomit in people’s faces. But here are some …